The Fear of COVID. The Fear of Polio.

This article is a personal account of how the coronavirus pandemic triggered my childhood defenses, just like when I fell victim to the polio epidemic. It describes the similarities between the experiences of polio and reactions to the pandemic, like the collapse of time, the feeling of numbness and passivity, managing fear through denial, and the reentry into a changed world. When a terrible illness threatens your body, it cracks the fantasy of invincibility, physical resilience, and a promising future. The article went through different titles. First, Staying Alive, reflecting the universal preoccupation of the past 3 years. The second attempt stated the core premise as The Events That Change Us. The current title, Falling Out of the World, dares to name the deeper premise of the article – how traumatic events can make us lose connection with the world we once knew. There is no return to normalcy.

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