We may find ourselves in situations where we wonder how it is possible to still feel happiness. Now, it is important to understand that any unhappiness can also be an important signal that we need to change something. However, once we have acknowledged the signal, and whether we can change our current situation or not, we can return to a state of greater happiness. Our happiness seems to depend to a large extent on external circumstances, but since it is a feeling we feel in ourselves, we have more influence over it than we think.
What frequently causes unhappiness is that we may be attached to things that are not really relevant or meaningful to us. For example, you may focus on making a certain amount of money, but what you are really looking for is a feeling of security and independence. Happiness can then be increased by working on these feelings more directly rather than running in a hamster wheel as fast as you can to make an x amount of money, which would still not quite down the feelings of insecurity and lack of autonomy.
So, one way of finding greater happiness is to focus on what remains stable, our true needs, values and aspirations. This makes it easier for you to make decisions that lead to greater happiness and fulfillment. However, this does not mean becoming self-centred and egotistic. Just the opposite. If your needs, values, and aspirations are really sustainable they will not only be beneficial to yourself in the long run, but also to others. You are making the whole world a happier place.
Another way to find greater happiness is to accept what is a given. We can only change certain things, and sometimes we may feel that we should change something that we cannot change. It is also important to remember that large changes start from something very small. And that much depends on how we interact with other people. All great things start to a large extent on how people exchange information with each other. So, how much I can make the world even in a small way a better place depends on how well I am getting information across to you.
We can communicate with ourselves internally and with others externally. Both can be used to bring us greater happiness. Connecting with ourselves can be a great source of happiness, even in seemingly difficult times, because we are connecting with a tremendous resource, which can also help us to connect better with the world. Often people are afraid to connect internally because they know so little about themselves. That we are afraid to reach into ourselves because we know too much is an illusion. Tapping into good and meaningful information for our life is actually a good reason to connect with ourselves.
How we feel about the outside world also depends on how we select information. This goes far beyond the glass half full or half empty dichotomy because meaningful and relevant information always fills the glass. You may, for example, be in a situation where you feel that you have no control over it. However, you may find out once you know more about it that you actually have options that are much better than what you thought at first. Knowing more about a situation, yourself, and the world gives you a greater sense of control, and communication with yourself and the world is the road to get there.
Unhappiness is often a result of missing something we feel we need, values, and aspire to. There are at least two ways of looking at it. You may not actually need or value something that you feel you do, as we have seen above. For example, we may think that we value money, while it is really the safety that money appears to buy, which we value. On the other hand, you may get more of what you value and need from a situation if you know more about it. Information is both powerful and helpful, and having better and more meaningful information can increase your happiness.
How do we communicate more effectively, so that our happiness increases? The sources of information should be meaningful to you and help you as a person in ways that really align with who you are. A good way to find out is to connect with yourself and identify what felt good in the past, what you enjoy doing now, and what fills you with bliss when you imagine it in the future. This may require some practice, but communicating with yourself in helpful ways also changes how you communicate with the world so that you find happiness in yourself and the world.
© 2021 Christian Jonathan Haverkampf. All Rights Reserved. For more articles, see www.askdrjonathan.com. To contact me, please see www.jonathanhaverkampf.com or www.jonathanhaverkampf.ie. I am also a guest on www.wordnets.com. These are just my thoughts. I may be wrong.
