A free practical resource: Finding the words to ask for help. Read it here or save a two-page PDF. No sign-up.

Asking for help can take a great deal of effort. Waiting afterwards may feel uncertain, tiring or lonely. You do not have to organise everything today. This page offers a few questions and a small contact plan to help you find a next step while waiting for counselling, psychotherapy or another mental health service.

If help cannot wait: for immediate danger, a medical emergency, inability to stay safe, or if someone is about to harm themselves or another person, call 112 or 999 in Ireland, or go to an emergency department. Elsewhere, use your local emergency number. Do not wait for a routine appointment, website reply or public comment.

If you cannot make a voice call in Ireland, emergency SMS to 112 is available from an Irish mobile network. Voice calls are faster where possible. Include the emergency service needed, what is happening and your location; follow the official instructions and do not assume receipt until you receive a reply.

Ask what happens next · Make a small contact plan · Find human support

Start with one question about the next step

If you have enough energy for one enquiry, you could ask the service whether it has received your referral or request. If you do not know whom to contact, the person who referred you may be able to clarify the route. You can ask for information without having a perfectly organised account of what is wrong.

You could adapt these words:

“I am waiting for support. Could you tell me what happens next, who I can contact in the meantime, and what I should do if things become harder?”

Choose any questions that matter to you:

Has my referral or enquiry arrived, and is anything else needed?
How will I hear about an appointment? When would it be reasonable to check again?
Who can advise me while I wait, and how should I report a change in my needs?
Are there costs, eligibility requirements or other suitable support options?
Can we discuss communication needs, disability access, transport, caring responsibilities or lack of privacy?

Services differ. An enquiry cannot guarantee a place or a shorter wait, but it can help clarify what is known and what to do next. If speaking is difficult, ask whether the service offers a suitable written contact option. A trusted person could help you prepare or make contact with your agreement.

If things change, let someone know

Being on a waiting list does not mean you must manage worsening difficulties alone. Tell the service or your GP if your situation changes, especially if it becomes harder to manage everyday needs or stay safe. If you need urgent clinical help, contact your GP, out-of-hours GP service or mental health team; the HSE urgent-help page explains Irish routes. Use emergency care for immediate danger.

You could say: “Since I asked for help, things have changed. I am struggling more with ____. What support or assessment do I need now?” Medication options or changes need to be discussed with a qualified prescriber.

A small contact plan, if useful

You can write these prompts on paper or keep them somewhere private, if that is safe for you. Saving or printing on a shared device or printer can expose your notes; you can simply read the prompts and leave them. Leave any part blank. There is nothing to submit, and you do not need to complete a plan before receiving help.

My next contact: a person or service I can approach.
What I want to ask: one question that would make the next step clearer.
If things become harder: the clinical or urgent-help route I can use.
One practical support: someone I could ask for company, help with a call, food, transport or another manageable task.

If nobody comes to mind, that is a reason to explore support services, not a failure to complete the plan. Ask only for what is safe and useful in your circumstances. If someone monitors your device, our abuse-support guide includes information about safer ways to seek help.

Use what is already helpful; leave the rest

The short preparation sheet can help you describe what has been difficult and what you would like support with. You can also read what a first psychotherapy session may involve. Neither is homework you must finish.

For today, it may be enough to make one ordinary task easier or speak with someone. Choose relevant material through Find Help; you do not have to keep searching until you feel completely certain.

Human support while you wait

Someone to listen in Ireland: Samaritans, 116 123, free, day or night. If writing feels easier, Text About It offers text and WhatsApp support. HSE lists texting HELLO to 50808; check the provider’s current options if your network does not support it. Its alternative SMS number may incur standard charges.
Cost is a barrier: explore free and low-cost counselling and practical support with money pressure. Availability and eligibility vary.
If you are under 18: a safe trusted adult, your GP or your existing service can help. In Ireland, Childline offers free listening on 1800 66 66 66 and online chat, 24 hours a day.

If privacy is a concern, check the provider’s contact and privacy information before choosing a route. Text About It explains that SMS contact currently appears in phone bill or usage history. A text or chat is not necessarily hidden from someone who can access your device or account.

If you are considering private psychotherapy or counselling with Jonathan, you can read about the service, fees or make an appointment. Routine bookings and enquiries do not provide urgent monitoring or crisis care.

About this guide

Educational information and practical prompts, not a diagnosis, individual treatment plan or emergency service. Sources checked 23 September 2026: HSE questions about mental health care, HSE urgent help and the support providers linked above. See our disclaimer.

Free practical resource · 2 pages · No sign-up

Finding the words to ask for help

A conversation starter and appointment preparation sheet. Choose what is useful to you; you do not need to complete every prompt.

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Finding the words to ask for help

Start with a few words; you do not need a complete explanation

You can ask for support before you know what is wrong. Use any of these prompts, skip anything you wish, or show this sheet to the person you are speaking with. It is not homework you must finish. [1, 2]

To someone you trust

I've been finding things hard. Could we have a short chat? I'd appreciate someone listening while I work out what to say.

To a GP or another professional

Something has changed in how I'm feeling or coping, and it's affecting my day. I'd like help understanding it and deciding what support I need.

What feels most important to say today?

A few words or one example is enough.

Optional: reflect quietly or make a private note.

When did it start, and what has changed?

Include whether it comes and goes or is getting harder.

Optional: reflect quietly or make a private note.

How is everyday life affected?

For example: sleep, eating, work, relationships or looking after yourself.

Optional: reflect quietly or make a private note.

What would help me in this conversation?

Listening, practical help, an assessment, more time or communication support.

Optional: reflect quietly or make a private note.

Keep completed notes private. Choose a safe person and contact method; messages may be visible to someone with access to your device. If you feel unsafe now, seek help now rather than finishing the sheet.

Make the next step clearer

Bring what you can; you can explain the rest together

Before an appointment

Bring your notes and a medicines list, including supplements. Mention alcohol or other drugs, health changes and previous support. Ask about communication support or bringing someone you trust, and how confidentiality works, including its safety limits. [2, 3]

Help the professional see the whole picture

Mention physical symptoms and any periods of unusually high energy, little need for sleep or behaviour that is very different from usual. These details may affect the assessment; they do not establish a diagnosis. Medication options or changes need to be discussed with a qualified prescriber. [2, 4]

Questions you could take with you

What might explain this, including physical causes? What are my options, including public or low-cost support? When will we review the plan? Whom should I contact if things worsen? Ask for the next steps in writing. [2, 3]

My next contact or agreed next step

Optional: reflect quietly or make a private note.

If the first conversation does not help

Someone may be unavailable or unsure how to respond. Your needs still matter. Try another safe person, a GP or a support service. You do not need to keep explaining to someone who treats you badly. [1]

Some things should not wait for a routine appointment

Say directly if you are thinking about suicide or self-harm, feel at risk, or are struggling to care for yourself. Contact a GP, out-of-hours GP or your mental health team urgently. For immediate danger or inability to stay safe, call emergency services. For free listening support in Ireland, call Samaritans 116 123 or text HELLO to 50808 (Text About It), day or night. [5]

Sources and further reading

Original prompts informed by the sources below; this sheet is not a diagnostic questionnaire.

You are welcome to share the link or an unchanged blank copy. Keep personal notes private. There is no need to explain why you are sharing it.

More free resources: jonathanhaverkampf.com · Version 1.1, 2 October 2026. Sources checked 3 October 2026.

General information and support for adults. Not a substitute for professional assessment, advice, treatment or emergency care. Immediate danger: call 112 / 999 in Ireland, or local emergency services elsewhere. Find support · Full disclaimer.